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What Mistakes Do I Make Setting Goals?

December 11th, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

goalsIn today’s culture the word “goal” has become a buzzword.  Many people say, “my goals is to ___”.  That is good, in the respect, they are stating what they want.  In that statement, they have substituted the word “goal” for what might, more appropriately, be called an “intention”.  If it has become such a buzzword, why is it that only 2% of the population have written, specific goals?

When I coach and work with people in business, I am always surprised that people find setting goals so hard to do.  They talk as if they will sit down and write their goals, but unless they have a business coach, who will keep them accountable, they tend to stick it in the section of their minds labeled “I will do this tomorrow”.  Why do people struggle with setting goals?

I believe, one reason is, they really don’t know how to set goals.  After gathering the information on how to set effective goals, some will still not do it.  The reason could be that many people are afraid of success.  When people hear that, they tell me they aren’t afraid of success, they are afraid of failure.  Let’s look at that statement a little closer.

As we progress through life we stumble, fall, and fail at many things.  We start this process off, early, as infants learning to walk, feed ourselves, and how to explore our environment.  When our parents tell us “no”, or we fall down, that is failing.  We all learn coping skills for the dreaded failure scenario.  Would it be safe to say most of us have a tool in our toolbox of life called “dealing with failure”?  Don’t misunderstand me, failure can be devastating if you perceive it that way, or it can be a tremendous learning experience.  It is all in perception.

Success, on the other hand, is a bit more frightening for most people.  They really don’t have a clear concise mental picture of what it would look like to succeed.  Our quest for success is often the place were we find most of our limiting beliefs.  Limited beliefs are what stops us from going where we want to go.  Limited beliefs are dis-concerning because, most often, we have no idea what those limited beliefs are until we get a mentor or a coach that can help us uncover them and hold us accountable.

Another area that trips up the goal setting individual is not taking responsibility for the people they hang around.  We are all products of our environment.  Our incomes will, often times, be very similar to the 5 people we associate out with the most.  Think about that for a moment.  Picture in your mind the 5 people that you are in contact with the most.  Are you all in the same economic bracket?

The last thing I want to propose to you is that most people are not in tune with their values.  They haven’t thought, consciously, about what they value the most or the least in their lives.  When we don’t know what our values are, it is easy to set a goal that is in direct conflict with a value we weren’t aware of.  For instances, if a person’s top value is their family and the time they spend with them, setting a goal for the next promotion or starting a business might be in direct conflict due to the increased time it will take to accomplish it.  Can you see the friction in obtaining that goal?

I have found the product called “Mind Movies” to be very helpful in developing a conscious mental picture of what you want.  Their workbook is exceptional in helping to pinpoint what we want and what we value most.  The Mind Movie is an excellent visualization tool for accomplishing the goals we have set.

I have for you, today, a 6 minute video entitled “12 Goal Setting Mistakes in 5 Minutes or Less”.  It has some very good information for you.  As Huxley said, “There is only one corner of the Universe that we can change and that is our self.”  If you gleaned some information that you feel others could use, feel free to pass it on!

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